In the digital age, teaching your children about online privacy is one of the most important lessons we can impart as parents. As the internet becomes increasingly integrated into everyday life, it’s crucial to guide our children in navigating it safely and responsibly. Recently, an incident made me realize just how essential these conversations are—and how important it is to be proactive when it comes to online privacy.
Our son, BP, has had a Facebook account for some time now, and while he doesn’t frequently post photos, there are occasions when he does. One afternoon, while scrolling through Facebook, I stumbled upon a post of BP’s showing a picture of his younger brother, LP. It wasn’t a big issue, but it was enough of a prompt to sit down with both of them and discuss the importance of online privacy and the potential long-term impact of sharing personal photos on social media.
It’s not that I don’t enjoy seeing photos of LP—I do. However, seeing that photo made me realize that we needed to have a broader conversation about online privacy, respecting others’ choices, and understanding the implications of posting personal information online.
When to Start the Conversation
For us, the sharing of that photo prompted a conversation, but honestly, I know that this discussion would’ve come up sooner or later. I had often mentioned that I don’t share photos of our family on my blog or social media, and LP had even asked me why. It’s one of those topics that every parent will inevitably face, and it’s better to be prepared.
To ensure that we had their full attention, we decided to have the conversation in the living room, with the TV off and no distractions. We sat down together on the sofa and brought up the issue of BP posting a photo of LP. BP explained that LP had given him permission to post it, but I quickly pointed out that LP might not fully understand what he was agreeing to, especially considering that he’s much younger.
Explaining the Risks to Younger Children
When it comes to younger children, they often don’t understand the long-term consequences of posting photos or personal information online. LP, at his age, didn’t see the problem with sharing a silly photo of himself running around or making faces. However, I explained to him that, as he grows older, there might come a time when he doesn’t want those photos floating around on the internet. By then, it would be too late to take them back.
I explained to LP that once something is posted online, it doesn’t just disappear. Even if the photo is deleted, it can still be saved, shared, or copied by others. This concept was a bit difficult for him to grasp, but I made sure he understood that the internet is permanent and that photos shared today could come back to haunt him in the future.
Talking to Teens About Their Digital Footprint
As children grow older and begin using social media more frequently, they often post pictures of themselves, their friends, and their everyday lives. By the time they’re teenagers, most kids have social media accounts, whether it’s Facebook, Instagram, Snapchat, or any of the other platforms that exist today. However, just because they’re posting pictures for fun doesn’t mean they’re thinking about the long-term effects of doing so.
We sat down with BP and explained how something as innocent as posting a silly picture with friends could have consequences down the line. We used an example that he could relate to: photos of him when he was younger, visiting Disney World and hugging Mickey Mouse. When BP was 8 years old, he was happy to share that photo with the world. However, as a 13-year-old, he would find that picture embarrassing if it were shared on social media today. We explained that the photos posted now could be viewed by potential future employers or even college admission officers. If someone were to search his name in the future, they might come across those images and judge him based on them.
BP understood the point we were making when it came to his own photos, but like most teenagers, he didn’t entirely agree with the idea of limiting what he could post. That’s where the balance comes in: while we want him to express himself, we also need to teach him to be mindful of what he’s sharing and who can see it. The internet is forever, and everything posted leaves a digital footprint.
The Evolution of the Internet and Privacy Concerns
Growing up in the 1980s and 90s, I had a unique perspective on the internet’s evolution. I was born in 1981, at a time when the internet was in its infancy. I remember the early days of the World Wide Web, which was just a network connecting universities before it exploded into the global phenomenon we know today. When I was in college, I used the internet to search for information for assignments, but social media, as we know it today, didn’t exist.
The internet as a tool for communication and social interaction really took off during my adulthood. I had the opportunity to witness firsthand how the internet went from a tool for research and communication to a platform where people share everything from photos to personal opinions to life updates. It was a radical shift, and I’ve always been aware of the potential risks that come with sharing personal information online.
As someone who grew up in an era before the internet became mainstream, I’m particularly conscious of how much personal information is now shared so freely. When I was a teenager, meeting someone on a dating website was considered strange or even suspicious. Nowadays, online dating has become completely normalized, and we see people using social media for everything from professional networking to political advocacy. But with this openness comes the inevitable risks of privacy violations, cyberbullying, and even predatory behavior.
I understand that as a generation, we didn’t grow up with the same level of exposure to the internet as our children do today. This difference in experience shapes how I approach teaching BP and LP about the importance of privacy. I’ve seen the darker side of the internet, and I want to ensure that my children are prepared to protect themselves in an increasingly digital world.
Why Privacy Matters: The Risks of Oversharing
The unfortunate reality is that children and teens can be vulnerable targets online. There are countless stories of individuals who have been groomed or lured into dangerous situations because of the information shared online. Predators can use social media to learn about a child’s habits, interests, and routines based on the content they post. This is why it’s essential to have ongoing conversations with your children about the risks of sharing personal information online.
Another important factor is the impact that oversharing can have on a child’s mental and emotional well-being. Constant exposure to social media can lead to comparisons, anxiety, and body image issues. Children may feel pressured to portray a perfect life or seek validation from their online followers. This is why teaching children about the importance of maintaining privacy is also about safeguarding their mental health.
How to Teach Children About Privacy Online
When it comes to online privacy, the best approach is to start early and have regular conversations with your children about what’s safe to share and what isn’t. Here are some steps to help guide your discussions:
- Set Clear Boundaries: Be clear about what types of information should remain private, such as addresses, phone numbers, and school details.
- Teach About the Permanence of the Internet: Explain that anything posted online can stay there forever, even if it’s deleted. Screenshots and saved content can spread beyond their control.
- Discuss the Importance of Strong Passwords: Teach your children about the importance of using strong passwords and not sharing them with friends.
- Set Privacy Settings: Show them how to set privacy settings on their social media accounts to ensure that only trusted people can view their posts.
- Be a Role Model: Demonstrate safe online practices by setting your own privacy settings and being mindful of what you share.
- Encourage Open Communication: Let your children know that they can come to you if they encounter anything that makes them uncomfortable or if they’re unsure about something online.
By teaching your children about online privacy, you’re not just protecting their personal information, you’re also helping them develop the skills they need to navigate the digital world safely and confidently. It’s a conversation that needs to happen early and often, and with the right guidance, your children can make smart choices that protect their online identity for years to come.